Naruto the Movie 2 and 3 review

Naruto the Movie 2: Legend of the Stone of Gelel
Naruto the Movie 3: Guardians of the Crescent Moon Kingdom
Review

The Expendables review

The Expendables Review

Naruto the Movie: Ninja Clash in the Land of Snow review

Naruto The Movie: Ninja Clash in the Land of Snow
The Review

What can I say about the Naruto series as a whole? Well, it’s an anime alright. From beginning to end, it shows that it stays true to the anime nature and provides us with several arcs worth of entertainment. Like with many anime, the Naruto series is adapted from a manga series. And like most manga adapted series, Naruto needs to stretch things out like a motherf … euh … you know, like one of those in order to stay behind of the Manga, which was still running at the time.
But, here we have Naruto the movie. It’s an original story set within the Naruto universe, using a few locations and characters from the series. Here we see a movie that has an actual budget, and it shows really well. So if you aren’t a fan of the series, should you take a gander at the movie?

Prince of Persia: Sands of Time movie review

Prince of Persia: Sands of Time

In the year 2003, one of the world’s greatest games was released upon this world. Prince of Persia: Sands of Time, was an amazing game that sold enough to warrant two sequels, a reboot and then a sequel to the original game but a prequel to the two games that followed after the original game. Yeah …

Happy Holidays from Greyarch Entertainment

 

Plug Tiem - Tren

I would like to point your attention to the Norwegian force of nature called Tren.

Half Life 2 review

Half Life 2, quick review

Disclaimer: this is a review of the main game of Half Life 2, not its episodes.

Kick-Ass review

Kick-Ass

The origins for this movie begin in 2008 when a comic book series was created called Kick-Ass. Written by Mark Millar (known for writing The Ultimates, Civil War, Ultimate Fantastic Four and Wanted) and penned by John Romita Jr., the comic book series gotten a lot of mixed reviews. In the end it was said that it looked great but read rather weak.

Before the first issue of the series was even published, the rights to the movie were already sold. The director, Matthew Vaughn, stated that writing the comic and writing the screenplay happened at the same time, making it more of an organic process. Of course, certain things were changed, but the fans of the movie that have read the comics state that it are changes for the better.

So, is the movie good? Is it bad? Let’s find out shall we? Oh, mild spoilers ahead so beware all ye who enter here. Just skip to the TO SUMMARIZE part if you wanna know what I find of this movie.

Story:

Haven’t you ever wondered what it would be like if you were a superhero? There are a lot of injustices in the world and many of them go by noticed, without anybody interfering as they are afraid of their own life. If you were standing at your window and you saw someone getting kicked all over the place … would you go down to help? Yeah, you would call the cops if you weren’t noticed, but what if you were? What would you do?
This is how the movie begins, with Dave Lizewski asking himself these questions. Sometimes, you just have to do it. So he buys a costume off of e-bay and goes out in to the streets to kick some ass! Only to take more than he dishes out. A whole lot more. In fact, this guy gets his ass kicked so hard, his nerve endings stop functioning.
Eventually, the young kid finds himself to be way in over his head when he gets blamed by the big bad criminals for something done by two other characters, Big Daddy and Hit-Girl.
Big Daddy is an ex-cop who got framed  and is now seeking revenge for his time served. Who’s the target? The boss of said big bad criminals. With his is his eleven year old daughter, Hit-Girl.

Without getting in to much more of the plot, I can tell you the following:

For the movie being called Kick-Ass, it has little to nothing about the character in the end. Yes, it revolves around him and his need to do good in the world, but once he gets sucked in to the battle between Big Daddy and the criminals, he takes a back seat. And I mean literally take a back seat. He’s so far back you’d need a fucking binocular to see him. If he wasn’t dressed in this spiffy green and yellow costume that sticks out like a white rapper, you’d barely even notice him in the last parts of the movie. Which is kind of a shame because there was potential to go further with this character. There’s also an interesting sub plot going on with his love interest, which was on its own pretty good and downright hilarious.
Luckily, the trade off isn’t so bad. In place of him, the movie focuses more on Big Daddy and Hit-Girl, who are the most interesting characters of them all. On one side you see a loving father and a charming daughter, living their lives happily, doing what they want to do. They really love each other and it really shows. On the other side, Big Daddy is shooting his daughter in the bulletproof vest to get her accustomed to it and he’s giving her butterfly knives as a birthday present.
Another interesting character is that of Red Mist, who I wasn’t sure what to think of throughout the movie until the very end. Now here’s a character I really can’t say anything about without giving anything away, but let’s just say he’s got a personality that might be contradictive to what he is doing, making it look like he is actually disgusted with what he is doing and what is going on.
In the end the most interesting character was that of Hit Girl, who is by far the most kick ass character of this movie. On one side you’re thinking that she’s awesome and cool and whatnot, but then you realize that she’s just eleven years old and there she is swearing like a motherfucker and shooting people in the face.

What makes this plot so good is that it’s just so much more than what the trailer promised it would be. It isn’t just all action and comedy, but there’s also a lot of drama and deep moments that will stick with you until long after the movie is over. Especially the character of Hit Girl will make you think things over of how you’re supposed to feel about her. As I said, you wanna root for her but you also feel sorry for her.

Lastly, the humor is just fantastic. This movie will make you laugh a lot with it’s great jokes that sometimes come right out of nowhere. There’s this one fantastic moment near the end of the movie. Very dramatic and suspenseful as you have no idea what’s going to happen. If you want to know when, then all you need to know is that it’s the live broadcast, before the action sequence. You’re sitting there, marveling at the brutality of it all when suddenly … well, you’ll just have to see but DAYUMN, I laughed so hard.

Performances:

Overall, I can’t complain about any of the performances at all. But let’s take a look at the big ones.

Aaron Johnson plays Dave Lizewski. He plays the character quite well and very strongly if I might add. He makes the character seem believable and does a very good job of portraying being kicked in the ass and shown every corner of the room. Hell, after this movie he might just be a pro at it. Let’s just he doesn’t get typecast now or he might be in some real trouble.

Chloë Grace Moretz as Mindy Macready, Hit Girl. PERFORMANCE OF THE YEAR, people. Oscar worthy material if you ask me. She puts down one of the best superhero character I have ever seen before in my life. Unbelievable stuff, seriously. It definitely shows that she has a lot of talent and that she’s having a blast making this movie.

Christopher Mintz-Plasse plays Red Mist. Above average performance, nothing special, but he is quite good at giving this character a deeper personality just by the emotions he portrays.

Mark Strong as Frank D’Amico. Great performance if you ask me, the way he does some of the lines is downright hilarious. The man can be a comic genius in this movie. Whether by nature or by good directing, I really enjoyed his performance. Just so dry throughout the entire movie.

Lyndsiy Fonseca as Katie Deauxma was almost stereotypical in character and in performance. She did it as good as she could, though it was sad to see her part go so underused as it could have been a bit more fleshed out. In the end, stereotypical love interest and nothing more.

AND LAST BUT NOT LEAST: NICOLAS CAGE AS BIG DADDY. Adam West meets Elvis meets Nolan’s Batman. That is best how to describe his performance. This might very well be the best batman I have ever before seen in my life. I shit you not. Not only is Big Daddy awesome, but the man behind the mask is a great guy as well. A little bit of a weird assed father, but a great guy and definitely a loving parent.
Truth be told, he was the perfect guy for the job because I honestly can’t see anyone doing the scene of the live broadcast without making it look comical. He really carried that scene and made it so touching that it almost made you want to look away.

Varia:

The action sequenses were immensely brutal, bloody and gory. However, it never goes that one step too far that most movies like that tend to do. Take for instance John Rambo, Rambo IV, First Blood Part whatever. That was one bridge too far if you ask me. Doesn’t take away the fact that the action in this game is murder and very realistic … as far as guys in green spandex go, but you get what I’m saying.
One thing I absolutely appreciated was that THE ACTION WAS FOLLOWABLE. Not once did I wonder what the fuck was going on. Though it did came pretty close (Live broadcast scene again). 

Soundtrackwise, this movie is making me want to pick up the CD. A rarity for me but this is making me want to go out there and buy the damned soundtrack. And I haven’t bought a CD in … ten … twelve years … give or take.

To summarize:

A very entertaining movie that doesn’t only deliver in action and comedy, but in story as well. It’s not without its flaws, not by a long shot, but it’s still a good movie in my eyes. A movie where you can forgive its flaws just because its so good. So therefore I want to give this movie a solid

8/10

What I really found to be great about this movie is the Hit-Girl controversy where people went all apeshit over the way she acted in the movie. Her response? “If I said one line of what I said in the movie in real life, I would be grounded for years!” She even goes as far as called Kick-Ass “the film” in interviews just because of that and at home she called it: Kick-Butt.

This has been Puddle Jumper reviewing Kick-Ass! 

Team Fortress 2 tips & quick review

Team Fortress 2 - Tips and a quick review

It’s taken me a while *cough* but I’ve finally bought The Orange Box for the Playstation 3, the successor to the Half Life Generations box, where the Half Life, it’s expansions and a multiplayer game were bundled together.

My first impression of the game was literally that it sucked balls. There was just so much that I didn’t like about the game, things that were to heavy to ignore. I honestly thought that it was the worst multiplayer experience I’ve ever had.

But here we are, later in time and more experienced because of it. I’ve managed to study the game more closely and I’ve come to the conclusion that it’s not really that bad a game as I first presumed. Quickly mastering the controls, since they are fairly basic and generic even, I focused more on trying to understand the game instead of mastering it. Finding that it’s really all about tactics, I decided to really try and use strategy. Because, like always, good teammates are hard to find, I wasn’t only forced to take in account the enemy troops, but my own as well. What was on the field? Where were they? Are they any good?

What I also needed to take in effect was how crappy the game was. Take for instance the classes. Way outbalanced. The Heavy class is a class with double health and a rail gun. However, distance is shit and speed is shit. On short range, it has potential. But not much. Balancing him out is the fact you really can’t take him out easily. 6 direct hits with a missile and he wasn’t dead. A full 10 seconds of close contact flamethrower and he wasn’t dead. Barraging him with scatter shots with a scout from close range and he wasn’t even halfway dead.

Then there was the fact that the action is way to fast for your guns, making sure you’ll miss your shot most of the time. By the time you press shoot, the other person would have moved an inch and you’ll the shot by miles, no matter which class you are.

At one point, I was a pyro and the other guy was a pyro. We both had full health. I started flaming him from behind for a full two seconds before he turned around and started with me. He killed me and still had 15% health.

What breaks this game is its gameplay. But the music, the sound effects, the graphics and more are just insanely awesome.

I just wish people went to other maps now and then. All I see this day is Dustbowl and 2Fort.

Now it’s about 2 days after I wrote the above and I have to say that I somewhat changed my mind. Because, after a while, you start to get more acquainted with the game and you see something that lies a lot deeper. Therefore I wanted to amp up my time with the scout, really learn how to play it. After that I searched the internet for some educational guides and videos. And you want to know something? The scout is amazingly fun to play if you know how. But, I’ll get in to this in another blog.

Because of this, I feel a lot better about this game than I did before, seeing that it has a lot of potential and that it’s just a damned shame that it’s being neglected like this. I hope that with Valve’s new love for the consoles, they’ll soon release Team Fortress 3 as a game good enough to be stand-alone. Slap it on to The Pink Box with Half-Life 3 and Portal 2 and Voila! Awesome sauce. (Yes, I do think that they should skip Episode 3 and go straight for Half Life 3, making major changes to the formula in the process.)

Final score:

8/10

Last time I played I managed to find three points that could be very useful tips to other people. Even those who want to play this game on other platforms. So, ladies and gentlemen, here goes!

1) Know your classes!

Every class has its up and downs. Take for example the Scout. It’s a very fast character with a lethal swing and a very powerful, short-range weapon. Downside is that he has 25 less points of health than the average class. This class is best used on the offensive as support, or as a Zerg rusher when you’re on the defense. I’ve won countless of battles with the Scout just by Zerg rushing the enemy intelligence or the enemy control point.

But, when the time was right and I saw a shift in the enemy’s classes, then I too changed my class to something else. If the enemy’s defense became too strong, I would go Engineer and pull up a dispenser and a turret at our intelligence. If the balance was tipped and I was still alive, I would destroy that turret and set it up again at the enemy base if I could. If I died, I’d switch to a more devastating class to keep the enemy down. If you have your enemy pinned down to single locations, like their spawns, take a spraying class like a Pyro, a Heavy or a Demo. If you see a Sudden Death is imminent, become a medic and keep your troops healthy. When you see that the enemy has a lot of annoying fucking turrets, become a spy and SAP THEM GOOD.

Just know that the better you support your team, the better your team can cover you. Pick a class as your favorite and stick with it when your team is easily winning.

Most importantly though, don’t forget to fight as every class once in a while so that you know what you’re up against! Know their weaknesses and learn how to exploit them.

2) Know your maps!

Now this is an important one kiddies. Lucky for me, the only two maps being played at the moment are Dustbowl and 2Fort so I managed to learn these two maps rather quickly.

Learning your maps is always important in any game, but double so for this one. You see, in every corner, you have the probability of being shot to smithereens by a sentry gun. You wouldn’t even last a second. (cheaters not withstanding. And yes, I have encountered them a lot in this game, unfortunately.)

So not only do you have to get a good reading of where people usually place the sentries, but you have to know the places from where best to take them out if you’re not a spy. Or how to bypass them.

Another important aspect of this tip is that you know the quickest routes. Speed is everything in this game. The slower you are, the harder it’ll be to furfill your goal of the map.

Knowing every nook and cranny will also help you hide from attackers if your health drops too low. Normally I wouldn’t recommend this but this is the kind of game where you have to run back from your base spawn. And it’s a real pain in the ass.

As a last note on the previous two: Pay Attention to as much as you can.

3) Know yourself!

Combining the previous two items can be very tricky if you don’t have a firm grasp of what you like and what you can do. If you have seen videos or reviews or whatever of this game before, then don’t let that make the calls for you. Maybe you liked the Sniper in the Meet The Sniper video and you want to use him. All I can tell you is that you better get over it fast if you suck at it.

Also, know what you want to do. Do you want to be in on the action, be on defense or be support, then chose that and stick with it. Change it up once in a while if you must, but stick with what you can do best. The longer you play with one set, the more experienced and the better you become.

If you know yourself, then you know what to chose and then you can kick some ass. Remember, it’s not about points, but about getting victory for your team. The best way you can help out to achieve this is by doing what you do best.

This has been PJ and that have been tips and a quick review on Team Fortress 2. See ya.

Kamen Rider W review

There was a time when all I knew about Tokusatsu was the fact that Power Rangers was based off of Super Sentai. Then I was informed that all or most the ranger footage was of that series. Now that, ladies and gentlemen, was a very long time ago. I stand before you now having actually seen many seasons of not only Super Sentai, but Kamen Rider as well. And what a joyous ride it has been.

Today I wanted to review a little Tokusatsu series known as Kamen Rider Double/W. Before I kick it off though, I wanted to go a little deeper in to this Tokusatsu phenomenon and introduce some of you to it who haven’t been already.

Tokusatsu is a term from Japan that literally means “special filming”. However, it also applies to any live-action film or television drama that features superheroes and special effects.

It’s a term that is associated with various genres such as Science Fiction, Fantasy and Horror. Staples in Tokusatsu, which CineMassacre fans should easily recognize, include Godzilla and Gamera.

Most of you who are reading this are probably familiar with the fact that America has released several series of their own which are adaptations of Tokusatsu series. These series include Beetleborgs, Masked Rider, Kamen Rider Dragon Knight and most known of all: Power Rangers. Now, here is where a lot of people could get the wrong conclusions. You see, Super Sentai and Kamen Rider have seasons that, if they were released in America, would hail upon them the wrath of soccer moms everywhere. If Lord Zedd was too frightening, just wait till they get a load of some of the villains in Sentai and Rider. (here’s a hint: they actually kill people.) Not only that, but Kamen Rider and Super Sentai have far more mature storylines than seen in any Americanized season. Take for instance Power Rangers Jungle Fury. It is nothing more than a watered down version of Gekiranger with far less character development and much less deep character development. They “dumbed it down”. Immensely too. That’s not to say the Japenese series aren’t kids shows. Because they are. But let me just say this: If America thinks that Lord Zedd would mentally corrupt and scare kids, Japan is filled with serial killers and sexual perverts. … Euh … *rereads the last two words* Never mind. 

With that said, let’s dig deeper in to the 2009-2010 series of Kamen Rider:

In general, every season of Kamen Rider stands on its own and is situated in its own private little universe. There have been exceptions in the past such as Agito, which is a successor to Kuuga. W is not a successor per se, but it takes place in the Decade universe (MUST SEE MUST SEE MUST SEE MUST SEE MUST SEE) which on its own is a Kamen Rider who travels from universe to universe. So technically W is situated in his own personal universe, only his world is connected to other worlds from the Decade universe. Yeah, it’s complicated, but you will find this out rather quickly. Because there’s actually something you need to know about Decade. You see, Decade’s season ended in a cliffhanger, which was to be concluded in a series of movies after the season. Enter Movie Wars. First was a movie about Decade and how things continued after the cliffhanger. Then came a movie introducing W whilst at the same time giving the backstory of how everything began. This movie ended as W’s world collided with Decade’s story.

Interesting to note here is that there’s a plot element in the season that gets resolved in these movies, as these movies take place mid W season, timeline wise. In the grand scale of things, you don’t need to watch the Decade movies, only the W oriented one. So check that out before you tackle the season.

Truth be told, I didn’t like W when I first saw that movie. It was interesting, but I didn’t really like the characters all that much. Just too goofy for my taste. Were it up to me, I never would have even watched the season. But, after recommendations, praise and very positive reviews, I decided to give it a go anyways.

Can’t have a review of a TV series without discussing the theme song, amirite? Simply put, this is by far the best theme song to any series I have ever heard. Not only does it perfectly match the series which it is for, but it is also a perfect song to use in the series to add to the emotions a particular scene is invoking.

The more that I watched of the season, the more that the theme song grew on me. In the end, I got goosebumps just listening to the theme song. Usually, when I’m watching the final episodes of a TV series that I like and the theme song kicks in, I just zone out till it’s over so I can get to the good stuff without having to listen to the same song I’ve heard way too much. Not now though. I sat there and listened to every glorious second of it.

Story:

W takes place in the fictional city of Futo, also called the Windy City. No, not Chicago. Anyhoo, the story revolves around private dick Shotaru Hidari and his partner Philip. Why did I call him a private dick? Because that is his character. But I’ll get more in to that later. Now, the two of them run a private investigative service that used to belong to their boss, a former Kamen Rider by the name of Sokichi Narumi, father of Akiko Narumi who joined Shotaro’s and Philip’s ranks in the first episode. Besides doing normal PI business, the two also seem to attract some of the more abnormal cases, which is exactly how they want.

The City of Futo, you see, is being plagued by these USB sticks called GaiaMemories that can turn human beings in to Dopants, monstrous beings. Creators and distributors of these GaiaMemories  are the Sonozaki family, a rich and powerful family that sells them to criminal and people who would be interested in buying them for personal reasons. That is where Shotaro and Philip come in. Because of them being Kamen Rider Double, they found themselves quite capable of handling these dopants, solving these cases rather efficiently. And so more and more people come to them to handle these kind of jobs.

This is the basic premise of the show and it sticks to this rather nicely. Throughout their journey however, they discover new things and the case of the Dopants grows exponentially. Soon, new enemies appear, new allies appear and the entire thing gets more and more personal.

The draw of Kamen Rider W is the mystery of Philip and who he is, plus what the deal is with the Sonozaki family and the organization they run called Museum. But the one thing that pulled me in was the intense stories of the cases that Shotaro and Philip partook in. Especially the emotional involvement of the people turned Dopant or the story of the victims. Things can get really deep and emotional sometimes that it really makes you wish that the particular story wouldn’t end. Bad news was that it did end. Good news were that most of these fillers were double episodes and that a new story was waiting.

However, as intense and emotional that the series might be, there were a lot of silly episodes definitely created for the kids. Although they did made me chuckle many times, even luring out a good laugh now and then. Might be offputting for a lot of people. I know that it threw me off in the movie. But it only took me a few episodes to get over that and really enjoy the series, no matter how silly it got.

Like I said earlier, Tokusatsu can get rather dark. Too dark for some western soccer moms that can topple entire government if they wanted to. This series is the same. Not only do people die, but things get pretty dark in the emotional sense as well. Plus, and this is a little spoiler here, seeing someone explode in to a million frozen pieces when he was just alive a few seconds ago is rather disturbing.

Characters:

Shotaro Hidari is the former pupil of Detective Narumi, head of the Narumi Detective Agency. After his demise, Shotaro took over alongside Philip, mourning the loss of his boss and the circumstances in which it happened. The man likes to call himself a being a hard-boiled detective. Like in the old private eye stories, hard-boiled means that he has a tough attitude, confronts danger and engages in violence on a regular basis. A hard-boiled detective is cool, cocky and flippant. Through the course of the season though, it becomes quite clear that Shotaro is clearly half-boiled, as he is being pointed out as being several times by his friends.

The man’s heart is pure and good. He will always do what’s right and he will never give up on his friends. Always will he try and find a way to solve the case and save everyone.

He is definitely my favorite character in the entire series. Not only does he look the part, but he also acts like a cool detective. The man’s just awesome, no going around that. Although usually it’s his friends that make him look like a fool.

Philip is Shotaro’s partner, the brains of the duo. During the events of the W movie we are informed that Philip is not his real name. Instead it’s a name that Shotaro gave him. Named after the great detective Philip Marlowe, Philip has lost his memory and only knows that he wanted to escape the facility he was being held at.

The reason why he is the brains of the operation is because he can access something called the Planet’s Library, a plain of existence that contains all the knowledge of the world in the shape of books. Shotaro provides keywords that Philip can use to narrow down on the selection of books until one book remains, which will contain the knowledge needed to solve the case. Unfortunately for Philip, the one book he can not read is the book about his past.

Whilst Shotaro is subject to the most development in personality, Philip is most prone to get development in his backstory. And boy, what a backstory it is. Very engaging story that becomes a tearjerker in the end.

At first, Philip’s character was the one that threw me off the series the most. The more I got to know him though, the more I started to learn that he is like that for a reason and that he can’t help it. Like Shotaro, I just had to accept it and learn to deal with it. And also like Shotaro, his flaws didn’t stop me from eventually liking this character.

Akiko Narumi is the daughter of Shotaro’s boss, coming to Futo to first tell Shotaro and Philip that they are being kicked out of the building they used as an office, seeing as she inherited it from her father. But, once she finds out what the two are about, she joins them and … well … takes over in a way. She renames the agency, creates this “cute” website and starts handling cases and all. All this whilst twisting the duo’s thumb with the fact she can kick them the fuck out if she wants to. Akiko is the character that will surprise you here and there with some very good character development, but for the most part she’s just being Akiko.

I like her character a lot, even though she is the most annoying and childish character of the bunch that can really have me facepalm. She carries around these green slippers that she keeps hitting Shotaro with and at first I was like: Urg, but in the end I found it to be great when she did it.

It’s this character for whom you need to watch the Movie Wars film for. You see, a major point in her character development is handled in that movie.

Ryu Terui is a man who joins the Futo Police Department mid season. At first we’re not sure what his deal end, but it soon becomes very clear that he is indeed a good guy, but his back story is clouding his mind and judgment, making him do things that aren’t exactly good. Like with Akiko, his character starts off a bit strong, and though he is still like that in the end, you also have gotten acquainted with all new sides to him, creating a deeper character whom I liked a lot as well.

He is also a second Kamen Rider, namely Accel. The reasons for his appearance and the story he is involved in I’ll leave for you to find out. Just know that it’s a dark part of the story that certainly would have been watered if it were ever to be Americanized. Which I hope doesn’t. God damn you Jungle Fury. Damn you to hell! 

Coming up on our last two paragraphs here for the characters. First up we have the Sonozaki family. Out of all the Kamen Rider series that I have seen, the character development for these characters is aplenty and phenomenal. Reminded me a lot of the character development in Gekiranger where in the end you actually start to care for a few of these family members. Whilst the overarching plot for this family is pretty basic, it’s the personal stories that bring the juice. And a lot of juice it is.

Lastly we have the side characters. These range from characters in the Futo Police Department to the Futo Irregulars. The Irregulars are denizens of Futo that Shotaro goes to for information and assistance. They do their jobs nicely and not one of them you wish off screen. In fact, you’ll look forward to seeing them again. Very good group of characters that added a lot to the experience.

Kamen Rider Double:

I wanted to devote an entire section on this Kamen Rider as it is the main protagonist after all. W isn’t just a man who can transform in to a Kamen Rider, it’s two men that partner up in to a single rider.

During the events of the movie, Shotaro is given a Double Driver belt and his three GaiaMemories from Philip who has his own belt and three GaiaMemories. Philip and Shotaro transform, using a very cool scene and the transform staple: Henshin. As the W suit forms around Shotaro, Philip’s mind is transferred in to W, effectively controlling one side of the body.

There’s Six GaiaMemories that these men can use, three each. W is split up in to two halves so that when one side switches GaiaMemories, his half is turned. Thus creating a numerous number of combinations that each have various uses in the field.

Shotaro’s Memories include:

Joker - The martial arts enhancing memory

Metal - The strong and defensive memory

Trigger - The pistol carrying memory

Philip’s Memories include:

Cyclone - The fast memory

Heat - the fire memory

Luna - the agile memory

With so many Memories to use, the battles as seen in the series never become dull or “been there seen that”.  To me it always felt rather fresh and exiting each time that Shotaro and Philip battled one of the Dopants.  Everything becomes so strategic that you yourself start thinking what’s best for them to use.

The thing that I fancied the most was that every combination was very strong and very useful. Take for instance LunaTrigger. Shit be going Wanted right there, son. Bending bullets is SERIOUS BUSINESS.

Anyways, Double also has some very cool gadgets by his side like a motorcycle called the HardBoilder, which he can strap a rocket on to, a jet ski or an air glider. Cool stuff, whish I had one of those. But seriously, it’s actually a pretty cool bike, which Shotaro even drives when not W.

Other gadgets include the RevolGarry, a truck/garage that holds the HardBoilder’s other modes and the memory gadgets which are gadgets operated by a GaiaMemory. Now these are pretty nifty. One of these gadgets is a camera that can turn in to a bat and fly on its own to take pictures. Another is a frog that can record voices and alter them. And so on and so on. Cool little trinkets that gives the entire Private Eye thing another edge.

Quite obviously this isn’t it. I mean, what would a Tokusatsu be without an upgrade of some kind. These come in the form of another W GaiaMemory for Philip (which I won’t say anything about) and an upgraded CycloneJoker.

I can’t talk about Double without mentioning the coolest thing that I have ever seen before in my life. When Double is facing an opponent, at one point or another, Shotaro or the two together will suavely raise his hand, point at the Dopant and say: Now, count up your crimes. At first I just thought that was cool as all hell, but in the end I found that to be just plain damn awesome beyond belief, giving me goosebumps every time it happened.

The Tokusatsu part:

This leads me to the final part of this review before I wrap it up. Seeing as it is a Tokusatsu series about a guy in leather and shit fighting guys in rubber suits, there’s going to be action. How does it fair? Well … the effects are blatantly obvious, but too awesome to suck. You know those movies where the effects are blatantly obvious and they suck, well, this isn’t it. For once, the effects are quite cool. Combined with the action sequences, you barely even notice them because of how awesome the shit is that you’re seeing.

The Kamen Riders look amazingly cool, especially the scarf on one side of W. It really has this Private Eye feel to it. Quite cool. The monster look great as well, though sometimes it’s borderline absurd. Like the T-rex monster. That was just embarrassing. Still, it’s forgivable considering it was a great and outstanding episode.

Final words:

Kamen Rider W is a fantastic series with an amazing story, outstanding characters, average effects and great music. It’s a great way to start off Kamen Rider with if you’re new to the series. To me this series deserves a well earned

9.5/10

Sometimes a man who doesn’t do decimals just has to dish it out. A ten is out of the question, as the series is nowhere near perfect, but it’s just so damned good. Let’s just say this, the final two episodes of W made me cry. First of the two made me cry out of sorrow and the last one made me cry out of joy. That is how involved I had gotten with the series.

The only other time that I had that with a Tokusatsu series was with the aforementioned Gekiranger series.

Check it out if you can! This has been Puddle Jumper. Now, count up your crimes!

Tomb Raider Reboot in GI

The Tomb Raider franchise has been less than stellar in it’s last 3D adventure where Lara Croft was continuing the adventure started in Tomb Raider Legend. Between these two installments was a title paying homage to the original game, serving as a remake of the original game and another entry in the Legend universe. However, it became quite clear that the series was going the same route as it’s PS1 brethren. Is Game Informer about to bring information to the world that the fans have been crying out for, for years?

Jag Special: Green Lantern

A lantern is a member of the Green Lantern Corps, a police organisation of the Guardians, tasked with protecting the known DC universe. Existing for over three billion years, the Corps has grown to have at least 7200 members, known as Green Lanterns. 

The story of the greatest Green Lantern of all time, Hal Jordan, is being put on the big screen. Ryan Reynolds will be picking up the ring of the Green Lantern to grace us with what looks to be a fantastic movie.

LGR: Jak and Daxter series

With the Sly series getting an HD collection on the Playstation 3, I couldn’t help but wonder what other franchise would benefit from having an HD upgrade like that. The first thing that popped to mind is this series. Now, whilst there are many other series that deserve one, which I hope they get, I honestly hope that this series gets it first.
So, how best to portray how I feel about this series and why it deserves this, just read and find out in this completely new episode of:

Last Gen Reviews

Jak and Daxter series

R.I.P. Leslie Nielsen

1923 - 2010

Thank you for so many great movies. Rest in peace, man.

Fiesta Online Review

More and more we begin to see the works of dedicated people come online for the world for free. Same so in the gaming industry where full free to play games are released almost every day. Very popular among these types of games are the RPG games, of where there are many of the MMO variety. Fiesta Online is one of these MMORPGs. Question is, is it good enough to make the cut?

Fiesta Online
A First Impressions review

Wahlberg on Uncharted

Mark Wahlberg confirmed for Uncharted movie

Captain S review

He’s Captain S. And he is one hell of a guy. He’s Captain S. Be glad that he is on our side. At your request, he’ll be there to save the day. He’s Captain S. He’s bold and tough and strong and brave . The bad guys do not stand a chance. They see him and they wet their pants. He’ll kick their butt from here to France. He’s Captain S! He’s Caaaaaaaaaaaptain S! It’s

Hogs of War review

 

Hogs of War

Some games are just plain damned fun. And when you start to dig deeper, you will see that there is actually a pretty good game there that has been well thought over. This is one of those games. Hogs of War is many hours of not only single player fun, but many more multiplayer hours as well. As being a PS1 and PC game, does it hold up to the test of time?

Spike TV's VGA 2010

MTV’s Spike are the people behind the website known as Gametrailers.com, a site dedicated to showing people everything about games from reviews to interviews. Not only that, but Gametrailers also has a TV show on Spike’s TV channel called GTTV. They have a pretty big foot in the industry, but that doesn’t mean that they know what they are doing.

Power Rangers review

They've got a power and a force that you've never seen before. They've got the ablilty to morph and to even up the score. No one will ever take them down the power lies on their side
They know the fate of the world is lying in their hands. They know to only use their weapons for defense. No one will ever take them down. The power lies on their side…

Go go Power Rangers!
The Review

tHop - The Green Lantern

Welcome to tHop, where I take trailers and tell you all about them from facts to opinion.

http://trailers.apple.com/trailers/wb/greenlantern/

Codemasters CEO on second hand sales "war"

Rod Cousens, CEO of Codemasters has put in his two cents on the current “war” between retailers and publishers through an interview with Gameindustry.biz. He feels that this entire ordeal should end quickly before so that everyone walks away happily.

Gears of War coming to Kinect?

One of the newest rumors on the mill is that a next installment in the Gears of War franchise will be compatible with the Microsoft Kinect.

tHop - Battle: Los Angeles

Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to the show that discusses trailers, from the facts to opinion. This time we are going to take a look at an upcoming alien invasion movie titled:

Battle: Los Angeles

http://trailers.apple.com/trailers/sony_pictures/battlelosangeles/

The ? Files - The next Star Wars trilogy

Star Wars Episodes VII - IX

It’s time to boldly go where no man has gone before! … Wait … That’s Star Trek. Euh … Walter, Punch it! … That’s Stargate! Euh … It’s time to … use … the force? Is that right? Yes? Good …

Multiplayer Tips

Multiplayer is one of the most progressing aspects of videogames in the passed tears. It turned from being an added experience to being a fully fledged game. Just look at MAG if you want example for that. In this multiplayer, you will find that it is a universe all on its own. One that you need to fully submerge yourself in, in order to even try and get some skill in whooping people’s ass. For the people that still need a little help on this, here are some tips to get yourself higher up in the food chain.

Bad Lieutenant review

Bad Lieutenant
Port of call: New Orleans

tHop - Casino Jack

http://trailers.apple.com/trailers/independent/casinojack/

tHop - Scream 4

http://trailers.apple.com/trailers/weinstein/scream4/

tHop - Drive Angry

Drive Angry
http://trailers.apple.com/trailers/summit/driveangry/

JAG - How Mysterious

Hello and welcome to yet another rendition of 

Jumper's Art Gallery

How Mysterious

Puddle's Logs - November

I hope that everyone has had a very happy Halloween month and that you've been scared shitless over the past month! And that you have a boatload of candy to go through. 

Personally I had a rather fantastic Halloween, what with there being a CSI special where Morpheus went from Miami to New York to Las Vegas to kick some chosen ass. Yeah, I know, not exactly Halloween stuff but at least it was gruesome. 

As you may have noticed up above and around you, Greyarch Entertainment is sporting a new look. The banner up on the site is from an awesome artist named Mel Rains, who is a God of Awesomeness around Teh Pwn Shop. You can find him over at http://melrains.deviantart.com/ 

The header you see above here is just one of many that I made. You'll find one above every new blog that comes out! 

Not only that, but I'm going to release the blogs that I have been saving up since the destruction of TPS 1.0. 2.0 isn't up yet, besides the forums (www.tehpwnshop.com/forums) Starting with a new blog actually in my JAG series. 

A few final notes before I finish this:

- The Pokémon Nuzlocke run is discontinued. I might put up what I have for Pokémon Red, but I'm not sure.

- There have been little to no trailers of worth for movies or games besides one. So you might see that blog come up. Just don't think that it's going to be a roaring comeback xD 

That was all, folks. See you later!

PJ's Halloween 2k10 - Dead Rising 2 review

PJ’s Halloween 2k10
Rise of the Dead

Dead Rising 2, a PS3 review

The year is 2006. Yoshinori Kawano helmed a game that was produced by Keiji Inafune. This game would go on to become a legend within the Xbox 360 library as it didn’t just offer a great game, but it also gave the world one of the most recognized game characters, Frank West.
Dead Rising was a sandbox game that gave the player a vast amount of restrictions during playtime that could be completely and utterly neglected if you wanted to, giving the player a great experience throughout every playthrough.
Frank West is a photojournalist who willingly goes to a small town called Willamette to see just what exactly was going on. There he found that the streets weren’t peaceful at all as zombies roamed the streets freely. Frank, who knows what he’s doing because he has covered wars you know, orders his helicopter pilot to lower the choppah to the roof of a nearby mall. After telling the pilot to return in three days, Frank heads in to the mall to try and find out as much as he can. Through his adventure he discovers what exactly created these zombies and why there was an outbreak.

2010. The team that brought us Dead Rising returns with another entry in the franchise that this time spread across a couple more platforms, including the PS3. Dead Rising 2, like it’s predecessor, is a survival horror game with a comedic twist to it. Whilst many people seem to agree that this game is more of a 1.5, I am here to tell you what I thought of the game. I myself have only seen a playthrough of a perfect run of the first game so it isn’t exactly a perception of someone who hasn’t played the first game. Still, let’s do this!

PJ's Halloween 2k10 - Heebie-Jeebie-Hullabaloo

Bart Simpson’s Treehouse of Horror
Heebie-Jeebie Hullabaloo

The Treehouse of Horror started in a Simpsons episode dedicated to Halloween. Homer went to check on the Simpson kids who were up in their treehouse. Once he made his way up to there, he discovered they were peacefully coming along, telling each other ghost stories.  Later on, the episodes moved out of the treehouse and in to other places, eventually even dropping the storytelling mechanic. All the while it still retained the Treehouse of Horror name.

Matt Groening’s Bongo Comic’s Group began to release comic books based on the happy family, meaning that they too received a Treehouse of Horrors comic every Halloween. Once the Bart Simpson comics started to roll along, he too received a ToH which was then, as usual, bundled. Three issues were bundled in to one and thus came the first Bart Simpson’s Treehouse of Horror bundle entitled: Heebie-Jeebie Hullabaloo.

PJ's Halloween 2k10 - So far

Hey everyone

It's that time of the year again. One of the most memorable holidays of the year is rapidly approaching. It's the time of year when everyone comes out to be spooky or to be spooked. I've been giving you a small taste of this whilst there are so many people out there that are willing to spread the joy as well. That's what this blog is all about! I'm here to plug a few Halloween experiences that are even going on still. Check all of them out!

PJ's Halloween 2k10 - Alan Wake

An outside look of Alan Wake

I don’t have an XBOX 360 for the simple fact that I honestly have enough having just the PS3. Yes,  I am missing out on a lot of great titles, but I have been able to experience them none the less by means of watching playthroughs on the internet. And because I don’t have a 360 doesn’t mean that I don’t understand it or anything about it. One thing I do regret is that I’m not able to play these great titles. What I wouldn’t do to be able to play through the Halo games or the Gears of War games. They look like a lot of fun with a nifty story and a great universe.
That seems to be their target demographic, eh. The people who are after a fun time with a blockbuster feel to their game. Like previous titles that I mentioned, there’s also Splinter Cell Conviction and many others. Granted, I’m really peeved that Conviction is a 360 exclusive, but it fits that console perfectly never the less. One game though seems to be sticking out like a sore thumb. And I do hope that instead of fixing it by not doing anything with it again or multi-platforming it, I am hoping that they make more games like it for the 360.

That game is Alan Wake.

PJ's Halloween 2k10 - The X-files

Whilst the characters from CSI aren’t all that interesting, other investigative shows really put in an extra effort to make the protagonists an interesting bunch of people that you really connect with. This day and age we have Rick Castle, Patrick Jane and Charlie Crews. Whilst in the past we had Jessica Fletcher and Columbo. Columbo being my number one favorite investigator of all time.
However, there is one genre of investigative shows that has one pinnacles of awesomeness. One TV series that has influenced countless of other shows, movies, directors, screenwriters, actors and more.

PJ's Halloween 2k10 - TPS Wallpaper

Hello everyone,

welcome to yet another Halloween month. Last year's was pretty damn memorable as almost every site produced some good content. This year, I want to do my part and do a few things too! First thing is a wallpaper that I made, enjoy!

http://fc03.deviantart.net/fs70/i/2010/275/5/5/tps_halloween_wallpaper_by_greyarch-d2zwebh.png

(Follow the URL. Thing is flippin' huge)

Totally acurate Half Life series review

It totally is

DMC: A Ninja Theory Article follow up

http://screwattack.com/blogs/Greyarch-Entertainment/DMC-a-Ninja-Theory-Article

I realized I may have focused too much on the character without going in to as much detail with the rest, perhaps even confusing some people. So here's a few clarifications:

DMC: a Ninja Theory Article

DMC, a Ninja Theory article

Right, let’s start off with the beginning here. Devil May Cry was first released in 2001. Made by the people behind the great series known as Resident Evil and Dino Crisis, Devil May Cry turned out to be something completely new. What started off as another Resident Evil sequel, ended being a whole new series that now featured a Hack & Slash style gameplay featuring a fantastic leading man known as Dante, who was badassery incarnated. He was accompanied by great gameplay, awesome music and a nice enough world.

PJ's Ruby Nuzlocke Run #6

Unfortunately this is the last part of the Ruby run for now, as I've started a FireRed run instead. I just bought FireRed and I couldn't wait. So sue me.

PJ’s Nuzlocke Adventure
Chapter Six

Dewford Gym

Pitch Black? Fuck noooooooooooo, I don’t wanna run in to Vin Diesel! Meh, was gonna fight everyone anyways. Makes people harder to find though. I GET IT, hiding like little bitches! HAHAHA, I would too if I saw myself coming.

That’s what she said.

PJ's Ruby Nuzlocke Run #5

Chronicles of Nuzlocke
Chapter Five

Consider this: If you’re pokémon are dead after they faint, doesn’t that mean that all other pokémon should be considered dead as well? Think about it. You’re commiting mass murder here by having innocent creatures duke it out to their death. I just killed two innocent pokémon and I got a badge for it, but after I brutally slayed dozens of pokémon to make my pokémon stronger.

Enough of that! Back to the game!

PJ's Ruby Nuzlocke Run #4

Chronicles of Nuzlocke
Chapter Four

Playing through this, Nuzlocke style, made me realize just how much the old ways are branded in to my brain. I keep putting my pokémon at risk only to realize in the nick of time that I need to peddle back before I lose them. If I’m going to make this a successful run, I need to get my act together. And fast. Managed to keep my pokémon faint free for now, though. Here’s to hoping I keep up that trend.

PJ's Ruby Nuzlocke Run #3

Chronicles of Nuzlocke
Chapter 3

Route 102

Ah, my first ever trainer battle. This oughta be good. I’m pitted against a youngster named Calvin, WHOT AN EDGY HIPSTER, who unleashes the mighty lvl 5 Zigzagoon. This sounds like a job for … C. Walken! Letting loose my mighty Walken, I hammered the fool with a head but, only being mildly annoyed at his retaliation. One tackle later and Calvin’s Zigzagoon was no more, winning the fight in the process! I is winnar!
Following this were a few other trainers that all tried their best to defeat me, but C. Walken hung in there and won all battles, without me having to use a single potion. In the meantime he was picking up items left and right like ultra balls, rare candy and stuff like that.

Petalburg City

Quickly enough I go in to Petalburg, home of Norman the gym leader and Dastan’s father. First person I meet is a woman who is looking for someone named Wall-E. I was like: Wot? But hey, whatcha gonna do? THE FUTURE IS NOW, YO!
Anyways, I went to the pokémon center to fix em up when I come across someone wanting to give him my profile or something. So, with the limited options available to me, I go with: “I Am A Smooth Machine“. Not even a chuckle out of him, never mind a That’s what she said. Douche.

Wanting to grab the next pokémon before I handle things at Petalburg, I come across this assclown that refuses to let me pass. He keeps taking me to the gym, saying I need to go inside. Bitch, fine. I go in, meet daddy dearest, help Wall-E catch a Ralts and be on my merry way. FUCK, why does he get a Ralts?! It’s not fair! That’s one powerful pokémon! Shit, son.

TIME TO MOVE ON! Finally. At least that one guy is gone now. Him and his stupid sending people to the gym fetish.

Route 104

First thing I did was go in to the grass. There was this one guy who was really panicky. He kept shouting: STAY OUT OF THE TALL GRASS! Dunno what fo … OH SHI-
A wild lvl 5 Wurmple appeared! This is it! Let’s rock! One short battle later, Wurmple was in my possession. Time to name this worm! And so, Soulja Boy joined the party.

Considering he’s only level 5, I went back to Route 102 and train Wurmple up to the level of my other pokémon. Turns out I shouldn’t have been watching The A-Team on TV whilst I trained. At one point I encountered a Seedot that used Bide on me. When I looked back at the screen, Seedot unleashed his energy and sent my Soulja Boy back. I almost thought he was gonna faint! Thank the lord that it stopped at 1 HP, just enough for me to finish this puppy off.

It didn’t take me too long to have him evolve in to a Cascoon and then in to a Dustox. Should have seen it coming. Soulja Boy would never turn in to something Beautiful. Let alone a Beautifly. Still, Dustox learned confusion! Guess that Ralts isn’t needed anymore. Shit just got real!

Ahwell, time to grind my pokémon to the same level so I at least have a fighting chance onwards.

Character: Dastan

Team:
FRANK WEST - Torchic (lvl 12)
Darkman - Poochyena (lvl 12)
C. Walken - Zigzagoon (lvl 12)
Soulja Boy - Dustox (lvl 12)

Fallen Heroes:
N/A

PJ's Ruby Nuzlocke Run #2

Chronicles of Nuzlocke
Chapter Two

So, what exactly is a Nuzlocke run? Well, at one point there was a guy who decided to lay down some rules for his next run of Pokémon Ruby. These rules were the following:

1) If a pokémon faints, consider it dead and release it as fast as possible.
2) You can only catch the first pokémon you encounted on each route/cave/sea/river/… If you don’t catch it, tough shit.
3) Nickname all pokémon.

After that he decided to document these travels and put them in a comic, in which there was a pokémon he gave the face of Locke, from LOST. Enter NuzleafLocke, AKA Nuzlocke.

A lot of people over at Screwattack have been doing this and it has inspired me to do the same. As you may have guessed by now, I’m using Pokémon Ruby and I’m going with a male character named Dastan.
Now, I’m not going to writing this entire thing like I am Dastan. And I do realize that it’s Professor Burke, and not Professor Elm. But in the end, what’s the fucking difference?
With that said, let’s carry on where I left the game.

Quickly I found myself engaged in battle because I wanted to level up FRANK WEST so I wouldn’t get creamed by that cheating bitch that has the pokémon FRANK is weakest against. When I saw that FRANK WEST was nearing 0 HP at one point, I literally shat myself. Luckily I had picked up that potion from the computer at Dastan’s home, otherwise I would have had to restart!
Anyways, I make my way onwards, coming across Sherlock D’Ohlmes there DRAWING FOOTSTEPS OF A BRAND NEW POKEMON. Then I fight Oak’s daughter May, slapping her mudkip across the room and back, sighing of relief that I was still in the game!
I go back home, get the pokédex from the world famous professor who needs me to fill out the pokédex for him even though he is supposed to be a fucking expert, get some balls, get the running shoes from Mom and head on out in to the world!

Pick up a Poochyena on that first route and named it Alyx, after that chick from Half Life 2. Beyond Oldale Town, where I battled May, I picked up another Poochyena and I called it Darkman, after the character from that classic movie by Sam Raimi. After storing Alyx in the computer, I went in the first area of the next route to catch myself a Zigzagoon which I named C. Walken.
With the team in place I started training my balls off to get these three up to snuff. I seriously don’t want to lose any of them. Unfortunately, I kept on getting hit with crits and I almost lost em at some points. My awesome skills however prevented this from happening.

So, here I am, about to head in to the first route with trainers. Help.

PJ's Ruby Nuzlocke Run #1

PJ’s Chronicles of Nuzlocke: Pokémon Ruby
Chapter One

The world of pokémon is a large and beautiful world filled with several regions that each have their own feel and pokémon. My adventures take me to the region of Hoenn where I was greeted by my mother who had traveled to our new home before me. I got stuck in the back of the mover’s van like some little bitch. Fuck that. So when the truck stopped, I got out and praised the lord, Bob, that I was out.
I’m Dastan, kid to the Petalburg City gym leader and all around awesome kid. I had this weirdest phonecall with the professor of Littleroot town before I arrived at my new home. One I’ll never forget. So the dude picks up, introduces himself and then asks: ARE YOU A BOY … OR A GIRL? I was like: Fuck you, asshole.

Anyways, mom shows me around, I set my clock and go out in to the new world! Eventually I find Professor Elm being molested by some Pooch, so I just grabbed one of his balls and tossed out Torchic. Elm gave me that pokémon! So I named it: FRANK WEST. The man then wants me to find his daughter up beyond Oldale Town. Yeah, this oughta be good.

Player: Dastan

Pokémon:
- FRANK WEST - Level 5 Torchic.

Fallen Heroes:
N/A

tHop - Priest

Graphic novel adaptation seem to be all the rage these days. 300, V for Vendetta and Watchmen are three perfect examples of this trend. Whilst they all received mixed reviews, one has to admit that they keep up with the style of comic-book movies in the sense of not sucking balls, like videogame adaptation (Prince of Persia being the one and only exception).
Here we have yet another adaptation that wants to take a stab at it. Ladies and Gentlemen, it’s time to Hop a trailer for the movie: Priest.

tHop - Priest
http://www.comingsoon.net/news/movienews.php?id=69665

Set one hundred years in the future, after the war between Christians and Satanists, a Christian warrior priest disobeys church law when he teams up with a young sheriff and a priestess. The man did so because a cult of vampire outlaws led by a former Christian, now Satanist, named Black Hat. They kidnapped the Priest’s niece and now he must save her before they brainwash her.

It’s a fairly standard story set in a world that reminded me of the Judge Dredd adaptation. They live in a city and outside there’s a wasteland. Although in the movie it’s more Modern Age City and Wild West Wasteland. Everything else reminded me a lot of Judge Dredd as well, besides the vampires that reminded me of the vampires in I Am Legend (THE HELL ARE YOU DOING OUT HERE, FRED?).
I am really hoping that this movie’s story is more than just this because from what we could see in the trailer, it has some pretty solid action in it.

But what’s a movie without actors, eh? Let’s sum them up:

Paul Bettany (Charles from A Beautiful Mind and Silas from The Da Vinci Code) as Priest
Cam Gigandet (Volchok from The O.C. and … OMG! JAMES FROM TWILIGHT! NO WAI!) as Hicks
Maggie Q (If you don’t know her, shame on you!) as Priestess
Karl Urban (Same as Maggie Q) as Black Hat
Christopher Plummer (General Chang from Star Trek and various other great movies) as Monsignor Orelas
Brad Dourif (Sheriff Lee Bracket from the Halloween remakes and Reed from the GUN videogame) as a salesman

HEY MOVIE, DRYING OUT ARE WE?

Alan Dale … FUCK YAH! (Charles Widmore from Lost, Bradford Meade from Ugly Betty, etc)  as Monsignor Chamberlain

The movie is Directed by Scott Stewart, the man who brought us Legion … Right …

Okay, as you can probably guess, it’s not exactly a star studded spectacle, but what this movie does have is a lot of talent and a lot of potential. It’s definitely on my radar and I advice everyone to put it on there as well.

tHop - Devil

OH MY GOD, A TRAILER! At long last a trailer! It’s been way to long! Let’s see … From the mind of M. Night … Fuck … Let’s read the synopsis.
“Devil is a supernatural thriller with M. Night Shyamalan’s signature touch.”
Ugh … roll the trailer!

tHop - Devil
http://trailers.apple.com/trailers/universal/devil/

The movie centers around a group of people that find themselves inside an elevator. At one point in its ride, the elevator comes to a halt and the people are stuck. The lights flicker and the elevator is darkened for a few moments, in which, the token woman gets cut by a sharp object. It would appear that someone in the elevator isn’t who they say they are.
What starts out to be a pretty cool concept, quickly turns in to a supernatural feast as the devil might be truly be involved in this case. Weird images appear on the security monitor and shit seems to be happening that shouldn’t be happening.

I have to admit that this does sound like a fairly good concept. Mind you, it would have been better without the supernatural crap. But, it’s Shyamalan movie after all so we can definitely expect for it to be different. Hell, I wouldn’t be surprised if it all turned out to be a partner of the one in the elevator who’s doing the weird shit like the monitors. Or it’s all a dream. Something like that anyways.

Luckily Shyamalan isn’t sitting on the director’s seat and we get another guy that might actually know how to turn Shyamalan’s madness around. Not only that, but the writer is Brian Nelson, and not Shyamalan.
So what we get here is a Shyamalan movie with a different director and a diferent writer? I’m game!

100th blog celebration!

Currently I have around 6 blogs on hold for Teh Pwn Shop so ... yeah ... also, no trailers ... at all ... so no tHop. I has a sad. Sorry bout that.

To celebrate my 100th blog here on Blogger, I decided to hold one big c****s****** party so hold on to your horses because here are some links:

www.debasedtothis.org - A fun website with a lot of cool people on the main site and in the forums. Sublime content as well.

www.headshotgaming.co.uk - a website run by people who hang around the same websites as those found at DTT. Great bunch of folk and definitely with a lot of great content. Senjaru, the big man of HSG, has kindly offered TPS a .com as well! Great guy.

www.thegameheroes.com - a website run by former members of Screwattack.com. They have separated themselves perfectly and are now an awesome website, who have affiliated themselves with Thatguywiththeglasses.

http://www.youtube.com/user/Darkbeatdk - This is Darkbeat, a man who has created a fun little videosegment called Do Ya Liek Teh Vidya Games? Awesome stuff, definitely check it all out!

And now for a great upcoming talent who definitely deserves some love:

http://www.youtube.com/user/ERod2010 - ERod, the blockbuster buster. There have been a lot of movies that have been hyped and praised to be the greatest blockbusters of all time. However, when the time comes and the cinemas take em in, they turn out to be nothing more than a big pile of poop. Enter ... ERod.
Inspired by members of TGWTG adding a lot of flavors of his own, ERod guides us through these movies and tears it a new one in the process. Literally!

This has been Puddle Jumper, check everyone here out and I'll see you next time! Don't forget to join the forums at www.tehpwnshop.com/forums !

Updates - september 2nd

Hey guys, PJ here with some updates

1) Teh Pwn Shop is finally back. After a month of waiting, and posting on the old forums which managed to be recovered, Tehpwnshop.com/forums is now officially up. So go check that out.
2) Unfortunately, the main site isn't up yet so that means that I'm going to hold off on big content, only posting tHops
3) Speaking of, I already got three big articles lines up for release
4) Also, sadly, there aren't many trailers I can "hop" ... which is kind of a problem.
5) Lastly, I'm not sure if I'm going to keep WIDS a regular feature. Not a lot of people have even critiqued it as I keep requesting. Which doesn't mean I'm stopping the series! There's still more on the way!

That's it for now!

Not another Irate Gamer Blog

Warning, what you are about to read is a joke blog made specifically for Screwattack.com. Still, it's enjoyable if you're not familiar with the site.

tHop: Fair Game

In the past few years, movies like these have come and gone far between each other. Too far, even. Many times they even went ignored for the most part. So here’s to hoping that Fair Game brings attention back to these kind of movies. Ladies and gentlemen, let’s hop it!

http://trailers.apple.com/trailers/summit/fairgame/

This trailer starts off with a loving family where nothing seems to be out of order. Wonderful kids, a great father and a great mother who is preparing to go to work. However, nothing could be more wrong. As it turns out, this family has a secret. Namely that Valerie Plame, the mother, is a CIA operative.
Valerie leads an investigation in to the existence of Nuclear arms in Iraq. Her husband, Joe Wilson, is drawn in to the investigation to substantiate an alleged sale of enriched uranium from Niger, seeing as he is a diplomat.
When his findings go ignored by the government, who actually manipulate his findings to support the call to war, the man takes action and publishes his findings in an editorial in the New York Times. Only then he is shown that you don’t fuck with America.
AMEEEEEERICA! FUCK YEAH!
Why? Because now, Valerie’s true identity is exposed in the papers. This politically motivated press leak pretty much annihilated her career and put humongous strains on her marriage. Not only that, but a giant, messy ball of controversy is sparked. If you think that’s the end of it, you’re wrong. Because Valerie still has very important business to take care of.

How can you not love a storyline like that? As far as suspense goes, this could really pony up. And pony up good. There’s the unfinished business in Iraq, the public opinion and their response, the strain on their marriage, family and friends. Plus there’s the politics, which if done right could lead to some very good moments.
The director of this movie is Doug Liman, another name that might only ring a bell if you mention what movies he’s directed. Namely: Mister and misses Smith, Jumper, but most importantly: The Bourne Identity. He also produced and directed (two episodes) of The O.C., produced Knight Rider and produced the last two Bourne movies.
This guy might not sound like all that much, but just look at the power in this movie: Sean Penn, Naomi Watts, Satya Bhabha (Scott Pilgrim vs. The World), Bruce McGill (Jack Dalton from McGyver), Sam Shepard (Swordfish, Black Hawk Down), Ty Burrell (Black Hawk Down) and more. Especially Penn, Watts and McGill will elevate this movie to another level.

I say: Keep a lookout for this movie. It’s going to be good.

Used games debacle

http://www.escapistmagazine.com/news/view/102983-Sony-Exploring-Online-Pass-Response-To-Used-Games

Now, here's a thought worth considering. Instead of trying to do something with the games, why not do something with the stores? Set up a system where the store can continue to sell used games, but where they have to put that game in to a system. Here's an example:

Steve bought Madden 11 and figured out it's basically the same as Madden 10 and the 8 games before that. Dissapointed he turns it in at a used games store. Here the store closes the transaction by giving Steve store credit or cash or whatever deal they give. The store then takes said game and puts in to the computersystem. This system is set up between the store and the people who originally gets the money from first hand copies. Let's say this system requires the game to be sold at 10 bucks minimum. These ten bucks go to the second party, whilst the store gets the profit they made beyond the ten bucks.

As for people themselves who sell games, those games should still be slapped with project ten dollars, but then the stores would be spared at the very least, possibly saving many jobs. 

I know that this is most likely not to work, but at least it's a suggestion that is mindful for stores, something Sony, Activision, EA and all those other companies don't give a rats ass about.

tHop - The next three days

No matter what happens in The next three days, it’s going to be the ride of a lifetime.

tHop
http://trailers.apple.com/trailers/lions_gate/thenextthreedays/

The trailer begins with a man and his loving family at the dawn of a beautiful morning. He and his son are sitting in the kitchen when the man’s wife comes and does her daily routine. This is to take a picture of the family, something she does every morning. A peaceful picture to behold and a hearth warming morning for many. It’s the usual set up for a movie like this. Although I am sure that this part of the movie will set up the characters quite nicely.
Alas, all good things come to an end. The police come a knocking on their door to arrest the mother for murder. Three years pass and the family has all but broken. The son has distanced from his mother, John is trying so hard to keep it all together, finding evidence in the meantime of her innocence and Lara is nearing the end of her wits. So, when they lose their final appeal, Lara attempts to take her life. This part of the trailer really had me connected to the characters. I already cared for them in the way that I wanted it to work out for them.
John then sees no other choice then to take the matter in to his own hands. By seeking help from a man who is an expert on this matter, he devises a plan to break his wife out of jail. Basically it all turns in to a prison break ish trailer after this, where John prepares to break in, eventually does and break his wife out. But, the difference between Prison Break and this is that there’s only a few characters, as opposed to Prison Break’s many. This gives the characters more time to go evolve so that the character grows and our connection to that character grows.
Lastly we see a cat and mouse game between the law and our loving family, even though we didn’t really see what happened to the kid. The action we see in this last part is like I expected to see in a movie like this, so I’m fairly positive that this will turn out great.

Let’s be honest here though, this trailer isn’t exactly the most original crayon in the box. We’ve all seen it before at one time or another. But, what really has me having high hopes for this movie is the great cast.  Staring as John is the ever so great Russel Crowe, the evenly great Liam Neeson, Brian Dennehy (Andy Goodman in Category 6: Day of Destruction), Olivia Wilde (Dr. Remy “Thirteen” Hadley in House M.D.) and Elisabeth Banks (Dr. Kim Briggs from Scrubs).
Most notably however is the director. Paul Haggis might be a recognized name, but he has made some great movies that have really made an impact on me. Just look at Crash and In the Valley of Elah, which he directed.  You might be interested to know he also wrote a few movies like the two previously mentioned, Quantum of Solace, Casino Royale, Letters from Iwo Jima and WALKER, TEXAS RANGER. I mean, come on, how can you go wrong then? The man wrote for fucking Chuck Norris.
So, even though we’ve seen the trailer many times before, I’m really hoping that Paul Haggis and the crew behind him manages to turn it around and really produce a movie that will be discussed for a very long time.

WIDS: Power Rangers Turbo

Mass Effect 2 PS3

Mass Effect 2 PS3

gtHop - Star Wars: The Force Unleashed II

If there’s one franchise that is both revered as despised, then it has to be the Star Wars one. George Lucas created a masterpiece with the first Star Wars, but then went on to create the third movie in his franchise. By then, the toys based on the franchise had made more money than the first two movies did and so it became more about the possible toys he could squirt out than the movie. Follow this by a horrible Prequel Trilogy, where George Lucas decided to change his own star wars universe and history, and you have a pretty good idea of the depths the mighty have fallen. Not only did Lucas trash the story with the prequel trilogy, but he’s also tinkering with the original trilogy by changing things digitally on the DVD sets.
Besides the complete and utter mess that is the movie franchise, Star Wars made its way to games as well. There’s been many, many successful and simply fantastic games with the Star Wars name, including a little game called The Force Unleashed. Now, the story of TFU is that it is set between the Original Trilogy and the Prequel Trilogy, guiding you through the story with a character known as Starkiller. And here we have a trailer for The Force Unleashed II. So let’s hop to it!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x5wH60en-FI

gtHop - Deus Ex: Human Revolution

Hey guys. Welcome to yet another installment of tHop, where I review and discuss a trailer. The trailers I usually go for are movie trailers, and therefore these tend to come very frequently. Sometimes way too frequently. Therefore I don’t upload these to Teh Pwn Shop. Now, it’s time for a change. Now and then I’ll throw in a special little trailer. A Game trailer. These will only be about really good games or really promising games. Special games that promise to be pinnacles of gaming. I’ll be uploading these to TPS because these will only come now and then. For my movie tHops, I refer you to here. At any rate, please enjoy the gtHop of Deus Ex: Human Revolution.

http://www.gametrailers.com/video/gc-10-deus-ex/702811

JAG - The Return

Ladies and gentlemen, I’d like to welcome you to yet another installment in my JAG series. The Jumper’s Art Gallery returns to you with a bunch of cool new signatures, avatars and even a wallpaper. And, for the first time, I’m showcasing some signatures and avatars using a new style of making them. I hope you like them!

JAG - The Returns

With the recent fall of TPS, the old site is gone. But it will never be forgotten. Just as it happens, I took a screenshot of the previous site and I incorporated it in to this wallpaper. Now, seeing as it is HUMONGOUS, I’ll just post a link to it.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v365/Nephilim01/TehPwnShopWallpaper.png

WIDS: Devil May Cry 2

tHop - Jackass 3D

What's there to say, really. I mean, it's Jackass. In Threeeeeee-Deeeeeeee

 http://www.comingsoon.net/news/movienews.php?id=68588

For those few of you who are unaware of what Jackass is: basically it's a bunch of guys acting like complete and utter jackasses, performing unbelievable stunts and doing amazingly stupid things just for shits and giggles. What are some of these stunts, you ask? See for yourself, they're too good to be just read. No, seriously, I'm not going to tell you. This is Jackass 3, so there's no excuse for you not to go out there and get the first two movies. There's also a TV show you can watch. Stay the fuck away from the game though.

Now then, Jackass 3D. The trailer, like the ones for the previous movies, doesn't showcase much. Actually, these trailers are the best trailers I've ever seen. Why? Because the movies borrow themselves to the trailers so perfectly. The trailer takes some of the lesser stunts and stuff and slaps it all together, ending this promise of hilarity with something really stinking funny. If there ever was a movie that you just have to see in 3D, then it's this one. Hell, the fad can end for all I care for it's not getting any better than this.

Personally, I can't wait to see this movie. Jackass has always been a guilty pleasure of mine. Whenever I see it on TV, I stop to check out the episode. It's sheer brilliance. There's nothing like seeing people fuck themselves up beyond belief for fun and on camera.