Saturday, August 28, 2010

Not another Irate Gamer Blog

Warning, what you are about to read is a joke blog made specifically for Screwattack.com. Still, it's enjoyable if you're not familiar with the site.

Wednesday, August 25, 2010

tHop: Fair Game

In the past few years, movies like these have come and gone far between each other. Too far, even. Many times they even went ignored for the most part. So here’s to hoping that Fair Game brings attention back to these kind of movies. Ladies and gentlemen, let’s hop it!

http://trailers.apple.com/trailers/summit/fairgame/

This trailer starts off with a loving family where nothing seems to be out of order. Wonderful kids, a great father and a great mother who is preparing to go to work. However, nothing could be more wrong. As it turns out, this family has a secret. Namely that Valerie Plame, the mother, is a CIA operative.
Valerie leads an investigation in to the existence of Nuclear arms in Iraq. Her husband, Joe Wilson, is drawn in to the investigation to substantiate an alleged sale of enriched uranium from Niger, seeing as he is a diplomat.
When his findings go ignored by the government, who actually manipulate his findings to support the call to war, the man takes action and publishes his findings in an editorial in the New York Times. Only then he is shown that you don’t fuck with America.
AMEEEEEERICA! FUCK YEAH!
Why? Because now, Valerie’s true identity is exposed in the papers. This politically motivated press leak pretty much annihilated her career and put humongous strains on her marriage. Not only that, but a giant, messy ball of controversy is sparked. If you think that’s the end of it, you’re wrong. Because Valerie still has very important business to take care of.

How can you not love a storyline like that? As far as suspense goes, this could really pony up. And pony up good. There’s the unfinished business in Iraq, the public opinion and their response, the strain on their marriage, family and friends. Plus there’s the politics, which if done right could lead to some very good moments.
The director of this movie is Doug Liman, another name that might only ring a bell if you mention what movies he’s directed. Namely: Mister and misses Smith, Jumper, but most importantly: The Bourne Identity. He also produced and directed (two episodes) of The O.C., produced Knight Rider and produced the last two Bourne movies.
This guy might not sound like all that much, but just look at the power in this movie: Sean Penn, Naomi Watts, Satya Bhabha (Scott Pilgrim vs. The World), Bruce McGill (Jack Dalton from McGyver), Sam Shepard (Swordfish, Black Hawk Down), Ty Burrell (Black Hawk Down) and more. Especially Penn, Watts and McGill will elevate this movie to another level.

I say: Keep a lookout for this movie. It’s going to be good.

Tuesday, August 24, 2010

Used games debacle

http://www.escapistmagazine.com/news/view/102983-Sony-Exploring-Online-Pass-Response-To-Used-Games

Now, here's a thought worth considering. Instead of trying to do something with the games, why not do something with the stores? Set up a system where the store can continue to sell used games, but where they have to put that game in to a system. Here's an example:

Steve bought Madden 11 and figured out it's basically the same as Madden 10 and the 8 games before that. Dissapointed he turns it in at a used games store. Here the store closes the transaction by giving Steve store credit or cash or whatever deal they give. The store then takes said game and puts in to the computersystem. This system is set up between the store and the people who originally gets the money from first hand copies. Let's say this system requires the game to be sold at 10 bucks minimum. These ten bucks go to the second party, whilst the store gets the profit they made beyond the ten bucks.

As for people themselves who sell games, those games should still be slapped with project ten dollars, but then the stores would be spared at the very least, possibly saving many jobs. 

I know that this is most likely not to work, but at least it's a suggestion that is mindful for stores, something Sony, Activision, EA and all those other companies don't give a rats ass about.

Saturday, August 21, 2010

tHop - The next three days

No matter what happens in The next three days, it’s going to be the ride of a lifetime.

tHop
http://trailers.apple.com/trailers/lions_gate/thenextthreedays/

The trailer begins with a man and his loving family at the dawn of a beautiful morning. He and his son are sitting in the kitchen when the man’s wife comes and does her daily routine. This is to take a picture of the family, something she does every morning. A peaceful picture to behold and a hearth warming morning for many. It’s the usual set up for a movie like this. Although I am sure that this part of the movie will set up the characters quite nicely.
Alas, all good things come to an end. The police come a knocking on their door to arrest the mother for murder. Three years pass and the family has all but broken. The son has distanced from his mother, John is trying so hard to keep it all together, finding evidence in the meantime of her innocence and Lara is nearing the end of her wits. So, when they lose their final appeal, Lara attempts to take her life. This part of the trailer really had me connected to the characters. I already cared for them in the way that I wanted it to work out for them.
John then sees no other choice then to take the matter in to his own hands. By seeking help from a man who is an expert on this matter, he devises a plan to break his wife out of jail. Basically it all turns in to a prison break ish trailer after this, where John prepares to break in, eventually does and break his wife out. But, the difference between Prison Break and this is that there’s only a few characters, as opposed to Prison Break’s many. This gives the characters more time to go evolve so that the character grows and our connection to that character grows.
Lastly we see a cat and mouse game between the law and our loving family, even though we didn’t really see what happened to the kid. The action we see in this last part is like I expected to see in a movie like this, so I’m fairly positive that this will turn out great.

Let’s be honest here though, this trailer isn’t exactly the most original crayon in the box. We’ve all seen it before at one time or another. But, what really has me having high hopes for this movie is the great cast.  Staring as John is the ever so great Russel Crowe, the evenly great Liam Neeson, Brian Dennehy (Andy Goodman in Category 6: Day of Destruction), Olivia Wilde (Dr. Remy “Thirteen” Hadley in House M.D.) and Elisabeth Banks (Dr. Kim Briggs from Scrubs).
Most notably however is the director. Paul Haggis might be a recognized name, but he has made some great movies that have really made an impact on me. Just look at Crash and In the Valley of Elah, which he directed.  You might be interested to know he also wrote a few movies like the two previously mentioned, Quantum of Solace, Casino Royale, Letters from Iwo Jima and WALKER, TEXAS RANGER. I mean, come on, how can you go wrong then? The man wrote for fucking Chuck Norris.
So, even though we’ve seen the trailer many times before, I’m really hoping that Paul Haggis and the crew behind him manages to turn it around and really produce a movie that will be discussed for a very long time.

Saturday, August 14, 2010

gtHop - Star Wars: The Force Unleashed II

If there’s one franchise that is both revered as despised, then it has to be the Star Wars one. George Lucas created a masterpiece with the first Star Wars, but then went on to create the third movie in his franchise. By then, the toys based on the franchise had made more money than the first two movies did and so it became more about the possible toys he could squirt out than the movie. Follow this by a horrible Prequel Trilogy, where George Lucas decided to change his own star wars universe and history, and you have a pretty good idea of the depths the mighty have fallen. Not only did Lucas trash the story with the prequel trilogy, but he’s also tinkering with the original trilogy by changing things digitally on the DVD sets.
Besides the complete and utter mess that is the movie franchise, Star Wars made its way to games as well. There’s been many, many successful and simply fantastic games with the Star Wars name, including a little game called The Force Unleashed. Now, the story of TFU is that it is set between the Original Trilogy and the Prequel Trilogy, guiding you through the story with a character known as Starkiller. And here we have a trailer for The Force Unleashed II. So let’s hop to it!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x5wH60en-FI

Friday, August 13, 2010

gtHop - Deus Ex: Human Revolution

Hey guys. Welcome to yet another installment of tHop, where I review and discuss a trailer. The trailers I usually go for are movie trailers, and therefore these tend to come very frequently. Sometimes way too frequently. Therefore I don’t upload these to Teh Pwn Shop. Now, it’s time for a change. Now and then I’ll throw in a special little trailer. A Game trailer. These will only be about really good games or really promising games. Special games that promise to be pinnacles of gaming. I’ll be uploading these to TPS because these will only come now and then. For my movie tHops, I refer you to here. At any rate, please enjoy the gtHop of Deus Ex: Human Revolution.

http://www.gametrailers.com/video/gc-10-deus-ex/702811

Wednesday, August 11, 2010

JAG - The Return

Ladies and gentlemen, I’d like to welcome you to yet another installment in my JAG series. The Jumper’s Art Gallery returns to you with a bunch of cool new signatures, avatars and even a wallpaper. And, for the first time, I’m showcasing some signatures and avatars using a new style of making them. I hope you like them!

JAG - The Returns

With the recent fall of TPS, the old site is gone. But it will never be forgotten. Just as it happens, I took a screenshot of the previous site and I incorporated it in to this wallpaper. Now, seeing as it is HUMONGOUS, I’ll just post a link to it.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v365/Nephilim01/TehPwnShopWallpaper.png

Friday, August 6, 2010

tHop - Jackass 3D

What's there to say, really. I mean, it's Jackass. In Threeeeeee-Deeeeeeee

 http://www.comingsoon.net/news/movienews.php?id=68588

For those few of you who are unaware of what Jackass is: basically it's a bunch of guys acting like complete and utter jackasses, performing unbelievable stunts and doing amazingly stupid things just for shits and giggles. What are some of these stunts, you ask? See for yourself, they're too good to be just read. No, seriously, I'm not going to tell you. This is Jackass 3, so there's no excuse for you not to go out there and get the first two movies. There's also a TV show you can watch. Stay the fuck away from the game though.
Now then, Jackass 3D. The trailer, like the ones for the previous movies, doesn't showcase much. Actually, these trailers are the best trailers I've ever seen. Why? Because the movies borrow themselves to the trailers so perfectly. The trailer takes some of the lesser stunts and stuff and slaps it all together, ending this promise of hilarity with something really stinking funny. If there ever was a movie that you just have to see in 3D, then it's this one. Hell, the fad can end for all I care for it's not getting any better than this.

Personally, I can't wait to see this movie. Jackass has always been a guilty pleasure of mine. Whenever I see it on TV, I stop to check out the episode. It's sheer brilliance. There's nothing like seeing people fuck themselves up beyond belief for fun and on camera. 

Wednesday, August 4, 2010

Inception review

PJ Reviews:

Inception


The movie is written and directed by the man who brought us the re-imagining of Batman, Memento, The Prestige and a few more flicks that have shaken the world of a lot of people. Christopher Nolan is maybe one of the best directors out there at the moment, there’s no doubt about that, but what he has given us here is a masterpiece. Inception wasn’t the best movie I’ve ever seen. It wasn’t perfect either. But the sum of the entire movie ended up being so awesome, that I really didn’t care.

Photobucket

(READ THIS: If you don’t want to be spoiled, just skip down to The Last Words. Not that there are major spoilers in here, but I do go in to some detail here.)

Tuesday, August 3, 2010

GTA IV: Episodes from Liberty City review

To celebrate the return of Teh Pwn Shop's forums (found at http://bobothemonkey.freeforums.org/ ) I wanted to bring you the review which I had submitted to TPS before. A review which will no longer appear there for the time being. But, never the less, I bring it to you here to fill the void that is gaping in our hearts. Ladies and Gentlemen,

Puddle Jumper Reviews:

Grand Theft Auto IV
Episodes from Liberty City

GTA IV is, as stated, the fourth installment in the numbered Grand Theft Auto franchise. Following GTA III, IV as well has successors to its name. Only this time, unlike Vice City and San Andreas, they are but mere DLC instead of a full fledged game. This, however, hasn’t stopped many, many loyal fans and genre fans to go out and grab themselves a downloaded copy of both expansions. Once both of these expansions had been released, Rockstar gave us Episodes from Liberty City, a disc containing both expansions, which has recently been released to the Playstation 3 as well.

Monday, August 2, 2010

Updates - August 2010

I think I had a successful July, wouldn't you agree? WIDS has re-debuted, a few good articles and more. However, I do have to some bad news for August. It would appear that Teh Pwn Shop has been hacked, including its forums. This hacker cleared out the forums. And not only that, but the entire site as well. So now, everything has been deleted and the two pieces of content that I was waiting for to get up, are being postponed.

So don't be alarmed if all you see in the next couple of days is some tHop's.